Lost

I sit here staring at this blank screen wondering how I'm going to say everything that I need to say. It's not that I don't feel like I can get it all out there, it's that I want to do it in a way that is most pleasing to God. I want to honor him with these words and with my life. Writing has always come easily to me and I know now that this is one of my God-given gifts. I often feel like I'm not even the one writing these words. They can flow through me so readily and rapidly that I feel more like an instrument for the words of God to flow through.

I realize that unless you have experienced God in this way, you may not understand what I'm even talking about. I have experienced Our Heavenly Father in a way that many others may not even know is possible. I am blessed to have seen him, heard him and felt him in my life. I have physically heard his voice calling my name. I have seen images that can only be described as from the spiritual realm. I have felt the physical touch of his hand on the back of my neck. Most of these experiences have come to me late at night while I am drifting off to sleep. I have often wondered if this is the ideal time for God to interact with me because my mind is at rest and free from distraction.

Well, anyway, I'm really just stalling because I know that what I need to say is going to be difficult. Admitting your own weakness is certainly never easy. I'll start by saying that lately I have been so consumed by the negative aspects of my life that I haven't even been living my life. Let me take you back to the very beginning . . .

I had felt for several months that I needed to make a job change. I can't really explain it other than I just knew it was time for me to move on and that God's work for me was somewhere else. I found a job at a completely different facility. I applied, interviewed and was offered the job. I struggled greatly with my decision. I didn't really feel like I had a sense of what God wanted me to do. After much prayer, I decided to take the job.

I knew by day two of orientation that I had made a huge mistake. I was not happy in my new job. I continued on, hoping that the newness would wear off, my uneasiness would subside and I would grow to like my new endeavor. That didn't happen. My dislike grew to hatred and I gradually became completely consumed by trying to figure out how to get out of my new job. I was desperate for an immediate change. I was beginning to make myself and my family miserable. I couldn't function outside of my job. I feel like I was trying to do a decent job in my work and my superiors told me that they were very pleased with how I was doing. However, outside of work I completely shut down. All of my relationships began to suffer. I felt so sorry for myself that I could barely function. I put everything on hold, pending on my much-anticipated job change. I was just waiting for my life to return to a more favorable state. I stopped doing God's work. I stopped singing with the worship team at church. I eventually stopped posting in my blog. I no longer read the bible on a regular basis.

I will say that I prayed all the time. I prayed for my family and friends, but I mostly prayed for myself and my job issues. I begged and pleaded with the Lord several times each day.  My vision blurred on the long drives to and from work as I wept bitterly, pouring my heart out to God.

I then discovered a new job. It was completely different from my previous work. I could really see myself in this job and I thought that I would really prosper in this new opportunity. It was a newly-created position that I thought God made just for me. I soared quickly and easily through the interview process. I was told that my interview was excellent and that I presented myself very well. I thought the job was surely mine.

And then I got the email. They offered the job to someone else! I completely lost it. I hit rock bottom. I felt like I was drowning in a pit of despair. I was trapped in this job that I hate and now there was no hope of any way out! I had pinned all of my hope to this job that now belonged to someone else. I was angry and confused. I felt so sad and betrayed. I cried out bitterly to God. Why?!! Why did this happen?!! What did I do to deserve this?!! Why would God want me to be miserable in my work? I thought and said things that I regretted. I yelled at my husband. I hated myself and felt responsible for the state of my life. What was I to do now? I didn't know how I could go on. I couldn't keep going back to that job that I hate. I just couldn't! What was I going to do? I wanted to completely give up on my job and my life. I felt lost.  

After tossing and turning all night I managed to drag myself to church the next morning, still feeling sorry for myself. I could hardly believe it when I heard the sermon. I thought that Pastor Greg was talking directly to me. I realize that the message was for me but that it was God who was doing the talking. Pastor Greg spoke about how the Lord has been working on him for the past month. He said that God was doing surgery on his soul and that he was removing the pride from his life. He said he didn't even know that he had this pride until the Lord showed it to him. He accounted that the process was very difficult and painful and that he fought it at first but that the Lord has helped him to grow spiritually into a completely new man. He said God was moving him to tell us all to give our sins and burdens over to God so he can work within us and heal us.

It was then that I recognized how selfish I was being. I wanted a perfect job and a perfect life and I was throwing a fit about it. I wanted things my way and I was not at all interested in what God wanted me to do. I realized that sometimes being in God's will is not easy and not comfortable. I went to the alter to pray and make myself right before the Lord. I felt humbled, cleansed and renewed.

I'm not going to tell you that I magically have a sudden love for my job because I don't. I can say that I do feel a sense of peace about the situation. I know that this journey that I'm on will probably continue to be difficult and somewhat painful. I've come to terms with the fact that for some reason the Lord wants me to be right where I am right now. He may have some kind of work for me there or maybe he will work within me through this experience to help me grow spiritually and be a better servant for him. Even though it's not easy to move on without knowing where God's plan will lead, I will go forward trusting in him and having faith that he knows what is best for me.

James 5:7-12

⁷ Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains. ⁸ You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. ⁹ Don’t grumble against one another, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door!

¹⁰ Brothers and sisters, as an example of patience in the face of suffering, take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. ¹¹ As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.
¹² Above all, my brothers and sisters, do not swear—not by heaven or by earth or by anything else. All you need to say is a simple “Yes” or “No.” Otherwise you will be condemned.
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Heaven

OK, here it is. The following words are simply the most treasured, intimate and precious words that I have received from the Lord. I have kept them close to me, in my heart and hidden from others. I have only shared them with a few trusted friends. They touch my soul so much that I can't help but weep every time that I read them. These words breathe spiritual life into me, soothing me with such peace and comfort that I can almost feel the Lord's arms wrapped around me as I read them. I realize that you may not have the same response to them because they are from our Heavenly Father and specific to me. I have actually considered never sharing these words with anyone because they are so intimate. I believe that the Lord gave me these words for a reason and wants me to share them with as many people as I can. Breathe them in and feel the presence of God as you read them.

July 3, 2009
Stay alert, my child. I am coming. When you least expect it, I will be here. Make sure you and those you love are ready. Tell them the Good News. There is so much more than just this life. You cannot even imagine the beauty of heaven. Your worries, cares, sickness and sin will all be left behind. You have perfection through me and will enjoy eternal perfection in heaven. The most beautiful part of heaven is being in the eternal, loving presence of my Heavenly Father. Imagine him wrapping his loving arms around you and giving you the best hug ever . . . that lasts forever. You have experienced only a small little slice of what heaven will be like: the feeling of the Holy Spirit in you, enjoying a moment of love and laughter with your family and friends, the feeling of having an open channel of worship to the Lord, the moment your son was placed in your arms for the very first time, the day you gave your life to me, the day your son will give his life to me, the day you married your best friend and true love, the moment that you realized the sacrifice I made for you so that you could be free from all of your sins, the day you realized that you too could have a personal, interactive relationship with me and our Heavenly Father, the day you really began to understand that I will love you no matter what, the first time you realized that you do make a difference in this world (when you played an integral part in saving someone's life,) the first time you realized that you do make a difference in the spiritual realm (you planted or watered a seed and helped lead someone to me.) This is only a small portion of what heaven will be. How much more, you cannot even imagine.

Revelation 21

21 Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”^[a] for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. ² I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. ³ And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ⁴ ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’^[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

⁵ He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”
⁶ He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give water without cost from the spring of the water of life. ⁷ Those who are victorious will inherit all this, and I will be their God and they will be my children."

Roadblock

Sometimes life is so hard. Making a decision that will affect your life and your family's life in a huge way is certainly difficult. So many hours of praying and waiting with still no clear direction from God is indeed a challenge. When this happens, I recommend that you follow your first instinct. It is usually the one that comes from your heart. If your heart is actively seeking God, this first instinct is usually the right one.

I believe that we can get in a place in our life when we just need a change. We can get burnt out and lose the passion that we once felt for what we've been doing for the last fourteen years. When we get to this point, any change can look good. I also believe that the devil can entice us into making a change that is not right for us at that time. He will make it look great. He can even make it look like it is something that is God's will.

Have you ever made an important decision and then discovered within about 2 days that you made the wrong one? It's such a horrible feeling. You can't go back to what you had before because what's done is done. And when you think about it you know you don't really want to go back because deep down inside it doesn't feel right to you anymore either. You're trapped. You feel caught between a rock and a hard place. You long for something different but aren't sure what that is or where that is. What do you do now? Who do you turn to?

Well, I believe the only answer is to turn to Jesus. He is always the right answer. Even when we have made the most horrible decisions possible, Jesus will always be right there beside us. He knows us even better than we know ourselves. He knows our deepest, most intimate thoughts . . . the things within our hearts that we've never told anyone about because we are too ashamed. Jesus knows all of this about us and he still loves us unconditionally. He loves us so much that he endured tremendous pain and suffering while he died for our sins. Who else do you know that has done this for you? He died for me and he died for you. Why did he do this? He did these things for us so that we could be saved from a horrible fate . . . eternal separation from God (also know as spending the rest of your life in hell.) What an amazing gift that is available to anyone who will accept it! What do you have to do to accept it? Simply acknowledge that you have sinned, ask Jesus to forgive you, recognize that he died for your sins and rose again and then ask him to guide your life. You will be amazed at what will happen. I know that I was.

So that's where I'm at right now. I'm realizing that I made the wrong decision. (Oh how difficult it is to admit that you're wrong, especially when it includes telling your husband that he was right.) But I'm also trusting in God. I'm looking to him as I take this one day at a time. I'm worshipping him in the midst of this turmoil. I'm seeking his face with all of my heart and soul. I know that I need him and can do nothing (NOTHING) without him. I will wait patiently as he finds a place for me. I also realize that God knew that I would make this wrong decision and I will try to accomplish his work while I am there. These are just a few of the words I got from the Lord this morning, "Oh, my child, I love you. I am yours and you are mine. Sometimes you must make the wrong decision to find the right one. I will bring good of this if you let me. Look to me and trust me in this. Continue to worship me with all of your heart, my daughter. I will never leave you: not in this, not ever. You are precious to me and I want what is good and right for you."

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Oh and one more thing. . . if you pray that God will block something if it is not his will and then you literally drive up to a road block on your way to the thing you've been praying about, take it seriously. It may indeed be God's way of telling you that he is "blocking" it.
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Blessed

I sit here on the porch in the beauty of the day. It is my favorite place to spend time with the Lord. I love to sit there rocking back and forth on the bench reading my bible and listening to the sounds of His wonderful creation. I can hear many different types of birds chirping harmoniously, creating a wonderfully soothing melody. The sun shines brightly as it filters through the leaves of the many trees in our yard. The squirrels playfully scurry about as they chase each other around trees. I can see a couple of bees buzzing nearby. I can feel the peace in the Lord's loving creation all around me. It beckons me. I feel a sense of God saying to me, "I created all of this for you because I love you and I want you to enjoy all of the beauty around you." I think of this and all of the blessings the Lord has poured into my life and I feel truly overwhelmed by His goodness and grace. He has blessed me beyond what I could ever imagine. I feel humbled by all that the Lord has given me and done for me. I give all of my thanks and praise to Him. I acknowledge that everything that I have is from my Heavenly Father. He has saved my life. He has saved my soul. He has saved my marriage. He has blessed me with a healthy, happy son when I was told that I would probably never be able to bear children. He has given me a wonderful Christian husband who loves me with all of his heart. The Lord has placed me in a fulfilling job in which I am truly happy. I get to help others who are sick and injured while I work alongside a group of truly amazing coworkers. I feel blessed to work with people who care about others and will help them and me in our times of need. My cup runneth over. I continue to sit and enjoy the peace of God's creation. I can feel Him in the creation all around me. He is the gentle breeze blowing through my hair. He is with me always and He loves me. I am His daughter and He is my Father.

Psalm 23:5-6

 ⁵ You prepare a table before me
   in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
   my cup overflows.
⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
   all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
   forever.

Rebirth

I sit here in the sun on this beautiful Spring day. The air is crisp and fresh as it gently blows through my hair. This birds are chirping. The world is budding with new life. It is a rebirth. I think of Spring with all of the renewal of life. The flowers are budding as they start to break through the soil. Baby birds are hatching and entering the world for the first time. The grass is a rich green color as it sheds off the dead brown of winter slumber. I drink in all of the activity around me and I can't help but think of one word - hope. I feel excited as I think of the hope of what the coming months will bring. What experiences and new memories with I have with family and friends? How will the Lord use me and grow me for His purpose?

Our greatest hope is found in the ultimate rebirth - the rebirth of Jesus as He rose again from within His tomb. He rose again so that we could experience life and love in freedom through Him and His death. It is only because of His selfless sacrifice that we do not have to endure eternal death and separation from God. God knows that all of His children will sin at some point in their lives (except for Jesus, of course.) The Lord is perfect and just in all ways and can only accept sinless, perfect people. He therefore requires us to pay for our sins in the form of death. Jesus stepped up and offered Himself in our place so that we would not have to pay this deadly price for our sins. If we accept Jesus, believing that He died for us and rose again, we will experience eternity in heaven with Him. This is the only way to enter into heaven. In John 14:6-7, Jesus says “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. ⁷ If you really know me, you will know^[a] my Father as well." The other thing that we are blessed with through Jesus' death and rebirth is the Holy Spirit. This Spirit lives within all believers and allows us to come to the Lord in prayer and worship whenever we want. The Holy Spirit allows us to have a personal relationship with our Heavenly Father. Through the Spirit, we can experience God and His love for us in ways that we never thought were possible.

Romans 8

Life Through the Spirit

 ¹ Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, ² because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you^[a] free from the law of sin and death. ³ For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh,^[b] God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering.^[c] And so he condemned sin in the flesh, ⁴ in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.

 ⁵ Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. ⁶ The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. ⁷ The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. ⁸ Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.

 ⁹ You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. ¹⁰ But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life^[d] because of righteousness. ¹¹ And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of^[e] his Spirit who lives in you.

 ¹² Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. ¹³ For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.

 ¹⁴ For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. ¹⁵ The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.^[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,^[g] Father.” ¹⁶ The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. ¹⁷ Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. http://www.biblegateway.com/

Peace

I have had quite a busy week at work. My week was actually somewhat exhausting. I can say that through it all I continue to remain close to Jesus. I continue to pray and talk to Jesus (silently while I'm working) throughout each day. I ask Him for help and continue to lean on Him in situations that seem beyond my ability to cope. He continues to provide help in the form of my co-workers and my boss. In the midst of critical and challenging work situations, I continue to find the strength and resources I need to accomplish everything that needs to be done.

I am still amazed at how He provides for me and keeps me close to him. He is so good to me in so many ways. I can't even begin to count all of the blessings He has poured into my life. The closer I draw to Him, the more peace I have within me. It is a peace unlike anything I have experienced. It's a peace from deep within my soul that feels like someone wrapping their arms around me and giving me a great big hug. It's a feeling of contentment and protection even when I am frustrated, busy and exhausted. It's the peace that surpasses all understanding. Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." I love living in God's peace.

 Not very long ago, I was in a place in my life where I certainly did not feel the peace of God in my life. I felt distant from the Lord and it was a very unsettling feeling. I wasn't following God's will for me at that time. Oh, I was going through all of the motions. I went to church every Sunday. But I wasn't seeking the Lord like I should. I wasn't reading the bible much at all and I wasn't spending regular quite time with God. I didn't consult Him in anything. I just went about my life making all of my own decisions, thinking the Lord would probably be on board with me. Well, He wasn't. 

You may be wondering how I attained the peace that I now have. Well it's simple really. I prayed. I sat down by myself, bowed my head and prayed. I asked God to help me to follow His will instead of my own selfish desires. I asked Him to forgive me for my sinful, stubborn ways. I asked Him to change me from the inside out and make me into His loving, compassionate servant. I started spending more time reading the bible and talking to the Lord. I found that the more I sought Him and was obedient to His will, the closer I felt to Him. This resulted in the amazing peace that I continue to experience.

2 Peter 1:2
Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord.
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Merry CHRISTmas

Christmas is such an amazing time of year. It is my favorite time of the year. Everyone seems nicer and happier. It seems like there is more love in the air. However, Christmas can also be very stressful. All of the decoration hanging, gift buying, present wrapping and card sending can really be taxing. Sometimes it seems like you will never get everything accomplished before the big day. When Christmas day finally comes, it is over in a flash. Ripping through all of those presents can often leave many people feeling empty and unfulfilled. All of that preparation . . . and then it's over in an instant. Why do so many people feel like this at Christmas time?

I feel that it is because we often put too much focus on the wrong things. Don't get me wrong, we do the decorations, tree, gifts, etc in my family. It has become a special Christmas tradition. But we also focus on the most important gift ever given, the gift of a baby in a manger who was destined to sacrifice his life so that we could live. Jesus is the ultimate gift of love and life. I have caught myself focusing so much on all of the other details surrounding Christmas that I almost forgot the most important part - CHRIST! He is the reason we even celebrate Christmas. Please take the time to read Luke 2:1 - 20:
¹ In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. ² (This was the first census that took place while^[a] Quirinius was governor of Syria.) ³ And everyone went to their own town to register.

 ⁴ So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. ⁵ He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. ⁶ While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, ⁷ and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.

 ⁸ And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. ⁹ An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. ¹⁰ But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. ¹¹ Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. ¹² This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

 ¹³ Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
 ¹⁴ “Glory to God in the highest heaven,
   and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”
 ¹⁵ When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”
 ¹⁶ So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. ¹⁷ When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, ¹⁸ and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. ¹⁹ But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. ²⁰ The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

These are the words the Lord has given me about Christmas:
Focus on me in the midst of this season, my child. You must celebrate me and the birth of my son, Jesus Christ. Think not only of how he humbly came as an infant child but also of how he sacrificed his life for you in the most amazing gift ever given - the eternal gift of love and freedom. Ponder these things as you celebrate with your family and friends. Celebrate in the name of Jesus and make these things known to those you love.

May you all have a wonderful Christmas with your family and friends. Please take the time to remember Christ in Christmas! Glory to God in the highest!
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A Fresh Perspective

The following are the first words that I have received from the Lord. I received them during one of the busiest times of my life. We were having a house built and we did a fair amount of the work ourselves. We had to make so many decisions at the time that I couldn't hardly focus. And then I can remember overwhelmingly feeling like I needed to write something. I wasn't to write just anything, I was to write a salvation piece. I can remember sitting among my paint samples, home decorating catalogs and floor plan sketches writing these words like a woman possessed. I felt and still feel that these words are not my words. It is difficult to explain, but I felt like an instrument. These words just flowed through me. Honestly, I could never write anything this amazing on my own. I feel like God wants these words to be shared with as many people as possible. I believe that is the reason he moved be to start this blog: to share his words and his work in my life with others. Please, please, please pass this site on to your family and friends. I want to reach as many people as possible with God's words. These are the first words the Lord gave me:

     I used to be dead inside and I didn't even know it. I would wake up in the morning, prepare for my day, go to work, come home ,eat supper, watch TV and go to bed. I was going through the motions of everyday life. I was living my life without actually feeling much of anything. I figured this was probably normal. After a while, life just becomes monotonous.
     Something was missing. I just couldn't pinpoint what that "something" was. Maybe it was a better job, a bigger house, a slimmer body, a happier marriage, the baby that I wanted so much . . .

     I was constantly striving for some seemingly unattainable goal. When I would finally achieve a goal, I was left feeling empty, frustrated and unfulfilled. I always wanted more. I was never happy; never quite satisfied. I was blinded by the negative aspects of every situation. Everything and everyone in my life fell short of my high expectations, including myself. I didn't like myself or my life and I couldn't even explain why.

     And then I found a new life: a fresh perspective, a clear focus, a sense of joy and peace, forgiveness for all of my shortcomings, a bright light shining through the darkness, an awakening in my heart.

     I found all of this and I wasn't even looking for it. I didn't know I was missing it or that I needed it. I didn't even know what "it" was. It had never been a part of my life before; not because I didn't want it but because I had never known it.

     "It" changed my life; not overnight, but gradually and subtly. Sometimes the changes were easy and joyful, like a heavy weight being lifted from my shoulders. Other changes were painful and difficult to bear. I now realize that those challenges were meant to serve as sandpaper, to smooth our my rough edges, polish me, and make me the best person I can be. I even continue to change now. I'm sure that I will be changing throughout the rest of my life.

     Honestly, "it" was not an "it" at all, but a "he." He loves me unconditionally. Every time I ask him to forgive me, he does so without question or hesitation. He is my best friend; always here when I need him and even when I think I don't need him. He knows me inside and out, even better than I know myself. He never does or says anything hurtful or destructive. He gives me strength when I am weak. He always builds me up and never tears me down. He loves me so much that he endured tremendous pain and suffering for me. He died for me; paid for my sins so that I wouldn't have to. His love for me is so great that he wants me to spend eternal life with Him in paradise.
     He does all of this for me and he will do it for you, too, if you want him to. His name is Jesus. He is ready to come into your heart and into you life. You need to find a quiet place by yourself and ask him to fill your heart with his presence and take control of you life. Now, take a deep breath and read the following scripture:
Romans 3:23: ²³ for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
Romans 6:23: ²³ For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.
John 3:16: ¹⁶ For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
John 3:3: ³ Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again.^[a]”

John 14:6: ⁶ Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.
Romans 10:9,10: ⁹ If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. ¹⁰ For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.
2 Corinthians 5:15: ¹⁵ And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.
Revelation 3:20: ²⁰ Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.

     If you feel in your heart that you are ready to start a relationship with Jesus and receive your eternal salvation, then please pray the following prayer:
     Heavenly Father, I have sinned against you. I want forgiveness for all of my sins. I believe that Jesus died on the cross for me and rose again. Father, I give you my life to do with what you want. Lord, please help me to live my life for you, daily seeking your will for me and casting aside my own sinful ways. I want Jesus Christ to come into my life and into my heart. This I ask in Jesus' name. Amen.
     It doesn't end there.Now you have to try to live your life following God's will and not your own desires. Live to please God and fulfill his purpose for you. Relinquish control to him and he will bless you. "You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised" (Hebrew 10:36). "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus: (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). Read God's word frequently and live by those words. The bible says, "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says" (James 1:22). Praise the Lord throughout each day. "Through Jesus, therefore let us continually offer a sacrifice of praise - the fruit of lips that confess His name" (Hebrews 13:15). Find the right church for you and attend regularly to worship God and fellowship with other Christians. Hebrews 10:25 reads, "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another - and all the more as you see the Day approaching."
     Just knowing about Jesus is not enough, you must know him on a personal level. Trying to be a good person will not gain you entrance into heaven, you must walk with Jesus daily to experience God's eternal, magnificent greatness. Jesus said, "Whoever acknowledges me before men, I will also acknowledge him before my Father in heaven. But whoever disowns me before men, I will disown him before my Father in heaven" (Matthew 10:32,33).
     Walking with Jesus will not erase all pain and suffering from your life. You will still experience hardship, sorrow and temptation. The Lord wants you to find strength and comfort in Him always, especially when you are struggling. "Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall: (Psalm 55:22). Know also that "God is faithful: he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it: (1 Corinthians 10:13). God himself will never tempt you. "For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed: (James 1: 13,14).
     God knows that you aren't perfect and never will be. He knows that you will still make mistakes. According to Ecclesiastes 7:16, "There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins." Continue to recognize your sins, confess then to Jesus and ask forgiveness for those sins. "He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy" (Proverbs 28:13). He will forgive you of all your sins if you ask him. God's word ways, "Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more" (Hebrews 10:17).
     God wants us to be like him and like his son, Jesus. The Lord put Jesus in this world to live as a man so that he would experience our pain and be an example for all of us. learn as much about Jesus as you can and try to live your life in his perfect example. As stated in Ephesians, we are to "be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God" (5:1,2).

     Jesus will be with you at all times; through good and bad. He said, "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age" (Matthew 28:20). Jesus wants to come into your life and into your heart. "Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.: (Matthew 11:28-30). Seek him always!

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Salvation

Before I go any further, I need to share how I came to know Jesus. It is a long story, so stay with me.

My husband, Mike, and I had been married a few years when we decided we wanted to add a child to our family. We were not Christians at the time and neither of had really been exposed much to the things of Christ. We did not attend church. We were spiritually clueless. We had no idea what we were missing and we really didn't give it much thought. Anyway, we tried to conceive for a couple of years without success. We sought medical attention with a fertility specialist. We underwent multiple rounds of various invasive testing. I took fertility pills a couple of months with no response. I then started taking fertility shots twice a day. I had ultrasounds every other day to monitor the progress. Finally, the third month I took these injections, we conceived a child. We were ecstatic.

This is me very pregnant.

My pregnancy proceeded well. However, I had an unsettling feeling. I felt like we needed to start going to church. I didn't really know why I had this overwhelming desire. I think it had something to do with raising our child in a church because it was "the right thing to do." We tried a few churches and finally found one that was right for us. We continued to be unsaved. We attended worship services about every other Sunday. Our baby, Ryan, was born. He was precious and we loved him more than we could ever imagine.

Mike and Ryan

Me and Ryan

We continued to attend church about every 2 -3 weeks. Pastor Greg gave wonderful sermons each Sunday. About one year after we started going to church, I can remember being at home one day when I just felt like I wasn't living right. I had always tried to be a good person and do what was right. I felt the Lord calling me to Him. That day in my home, I accepted Jesus. I asked him to come into my life and take control. I acknowledged that He sacrificed His life for my sins so that I could be with the Lord and spend eternity with Him in heaven. He paid my ransom and rose again. He lives today, within me and all of those who believe in Him.

At first, my salvation wreaked havoc on my life and in my marriage. Mike couldn't understand why I was different. Many arguments and a lot of tears resulted. Mike then came to know Jesus and accept Him. Everything got a little easier after that. We still have trials and hardships, but we have Jesus there to help us through them. We are far from perfect. Jesus died for us so that we could be perfect through Him. Think of it this way. You come before God on your judgement day. He will only accept those who are perfect into heaven. The Lord asks you, "Are you perfect?" You stand behind Jesus and say, "No but Jesus is perfect and he has me covered."

Jesus paid my ransom and He paid your ransom, too. He's just waiting for you to ask Him into your life. Imagine what He can accomplish in you and your life if you let him! Matthew 6:33 reads "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Are you seeking Him?
http://www.biblegateway.com/

A New Start

Hello everyone. I am new to the blogging venue. I never would have thought I would be starting a blog. I actually had no real desire to start a blog. God placed on my heart that He wanted me to do this to further His kingdom. I know many of you may be skeptical that God Himself actually told me to do anything. I know that I used to feel the same way. I didn't come to know the Lord until I was 28 years old and before that, I never heard from Him at all. (Or at least I never realized I was hearing from him.) I was a clueless person back then. I just went through the motions of life with no real purpose or satisfaction. I never felt like I was actively rejecting the Lord then, I just didn't know Him. I had very little exposure to the things of God. I didn't really know what I was missing and I didn't give it much thought.

Well, anyway, I have found Jesus and He has saved me. Now I have a relationship with Him that is very unique and personal. I hear from Him. I usually don't physically hear his voice. His words come to me in written form. I sit with pen and paper and His words flow through me. This is how it started. I was in Sunday school class one morning and the teacher said. " You can pray all you want but unless you sit and listen for a response you are just having a one-way conversation." That statement was absolutely profound to me. Sit and listen for the Lord? Would He really talk to ME? Why? How? What would He say? Well, to make a long story short, He did speak to me and He sure had a lot to say. I felt like I was going crazy at first. I didn't tell anyone because I thought for sure they would think I was a freak. I was getting pages and pages of words from the Lord. I was afraid of these words and I didn't know what to do with them. I needed some help. I finally told a few trusted friends and went to speak with my pastor about everything. He confirmed that I am indeed not crazy and that I was very well getting some words from the Lord. He told me to be careful about sharing messages specific to a particular person and to use discernment.

It has been over 2 years ago since this journey began. I would like to be able to tell you that I have grown tremendously in this gift and all other aspects of my spiritual life. Sadly, this is not the case. I did grow quickly and fervently at first but lately I have rarely made time to spend in the Lord or His word. I have felt distant from the Lord of late. I feel almost embarrassed and ashamed to admit that I have been blessed with an amazing gift that I'm not even using. What do I do with this gift? Does He want me to write a book? I started praying about it. He revealed to me that blogging about His words would be a great way to further His kingdom. I had some concerns at first. I prayed more. He revealed some things to me yesterday that confirmed this plan. First, the sermon that Pastor Greg gave yesterday spoke to me. He actually gave a testimony about a time he was sitting at his computer and words from the Lord flowed out of him. He described it as an "out-of-body experience" and said that the words were not his own. I related to this experience and feel the same way when I receive words. The second experience occurred at a Chinese restaurant. I rarely open my fortune cooking and read my fortune because I feel only God knows our fortune. Well, I did read my fortune and this is what it said, "Trust him, but still keep your eyes open."  I looked up scripture referencing eyes being open. I found Numbers 24:15,16.

The oracle of Balaam son of Beor,

the oracle of one whose eye sees clearly,

the oracle of one who hears the words of God,

who has knowledge from the Most High,

who sees a vision from the Almighty,

who falls prostrate, and whose eyes are opened.

These verses are talking about Balaam, who was a sorcerer that foretold of the coming of the Messiah. To me it says that God can and will use anyone to accomplish his purpose.

I am here, ready and willing to share the things of God. I trust in the Lord and I have a notebook full of words to share. I hope I have captured your attention and peaked your interest!