Spiritual Warfare

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and fearful when I focus on all of the evil that is occurring in the world. At times it can feel defeating. Perhaps you don't realize this, but there is a spiritual battle occurring all around us. Even though most people can't see it, the forces of good and evil are engaging in spiritual warfare. Angels are battling demons. However, we do not need to fear or feel overwhelmed. We can take comfort in the fact that Jesus has defeated evil through his death and resurrection. In Matthew 28:18, Jesus said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me." This means that Jesus has power and authority over the devil and his evil schemes. But the devil still wants to wreak havoc in our lives and destroy us. 1 Peter 5:8 relays this message clearly, "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." Ephesians 6:12 also addresses this battle, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realm."

So how can we withstand the devil and his evil demons that want to destroy us? We find the answer in scripture. First, we are instructed to not become immersed in the things of this world (such as money, material items, lust, sex, etc.) but to instead seek God and His will.

Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world - the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life - comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever. 

- 1 John 2:15-17

Then we are instructed to resist the devil, have faith in God, and receive strength from Him.

    Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. 

    And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To Him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.

- 1 Peter 5:9-11

We have power through God and our faith in him. We can wage our own battle against evil through this power.

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 

- 2 Corinthians 10:3-5

So what are these weapons mentioned in the above verse? One of my favorite passages of scripture describes the weapons that we can use to combat evil. See the information below that I clipped from my prayer journal to gain a better understanding of these weapons.

I'm going to end this post by recommending that you listen to the song in the video below. It is an amazing, powerful song that speaks to our power over the devil's schemes in our lives. I hope that this song becomes an inspiration to you like it has become for me.

Down

Oh, it's been so long since I've blogged. The reason is simply because I've really not been in a good place in my life lately. I haven't felt like I had any inspiring words to share. But then I guess we don't always need to have pretty, happy words to share. Sometimes words have the most impact when they are completely real and raw, from the very depths of our soul. I just spent time with the Lord and I feel strongly that he wants me to share something right now. He said the words will come.

I've been down. So very, very down. I am frustrated with the state of my life. I would actually have to admit that I'm depressed. I dislike my job so much right now that it has affected my entire life, every aspect of my existence. I feel physically incapable of happiness at this point in my life. I cry bitterly often. I am a total mess. This has affected my marriage and my family. I want so badly to have a new job . . . a job that I actually enjoy. I've wanted this for the past six months. I've prayed and prayed, begging and pleading with God . . . and nothing. Here I still am in the same job. I believe I had actually lost all hope and faith. I hate saying that. It's so horrible. But it's true. I didn't really know what else to do. What else could I possibly do? I had applied for at least 15 other jobs. Nothing happened. I felt a bit like I had leprosy. Nobody would give me the time of day.

I understand that I have no control over this. If God doesn't want me to have a new job, then it's not going to happen. I have been told numerous times that I must be patient and wait for God's timing. Definitely easier said than done. It's a different story when you're the one who has to be patient and wait, especially when you are miserable.

So now you're up to speed about where I'm at in my life and what I've been dealing with. I'm waiting. And it's very, VERY difficult. I'm going to take one day at a time. So even though I am scared and I can't see where the path goes, I'm going to have faith and trust in the Lord. (Oh, by the way, God did tell me he would move in this. He just didn't tell me when or how.) I'm going to seek God and be obedient to him. I'm going to keep praying. (I'm sure he may be really tired of hearing from me about this, but I'm going to keep praying about it anyway.) And I'm going to surround myself with the things of God. I will do this by reading his word and listening to Christian music. I strongly believe in the power of music. AND I WILL NOT GIVE UP! Satan has been trying to get me down but I will not give in to him! Did you know that according to the bible, Satan must leave us when we command him to leave in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit? Pretty cool, huh?

More to come later . . .

Worn

Sometimes life is so overwhelming and exhausting that you really can't even find any words. That is how I have been feeling lately. I know that God has a plan for me and my life and that I must be patient. His timing is certainly different from mine. Eternity to me is but only a second to my Heavenly Father. This first video is a song that I heard on the radio last night. It really spoke to me. The words in this song are the very words in my own heart. The second video is the story of how this song was written. Both videos are very powerful tools that the Lord is using to comfort his people and draw them closer to him. May these videos bless you the same way they have blessed me.

Matthew 11:28-29

²⁸ “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

www.biblegateway.com

Lost

I sit here staring at this blank screen wondering how I'm going to say everything that I need to say. It's not that I don't feel like I can get it all out there, it's that I want to do it in a way that is most pleasing to God. I want to honor him with these words and with my life. Writing has always come easily to me and I know now that this is one of my God-given gifts. I often feel like I'm not even the one writing these words. They can flow through me so readily and rapidly that I feel more like an instrument for the words of God to flow through.

I realize that unless you have experienced God in this way, you may not understand what I'm even talking about. I have experienced Our Heavenly Father in a way that many others may not even know is possible. I am blessed to have seen him, heard him and felt him in my life. I have physically heard his voice calling my name. I have seen images that can only be described as from the spiritual realm. I have felt the physical touch of his hand on the back of my neck. Most of these experiences have come to me late at night while I am drifting off to sleep. I have often wondered if this is the ideal time for God to interact with me because my mind is at rest and free from distraction.

Well, anyway, I'm really just stalling because I know that what I need to say is going to be difficult. Admitting your own weakness is certainly never easy. I'll start by saying that lately I have been so consumed by the negative aspects of my life that I haven't even been living my life. Let me take you back to the very beginning . . .

I had felt for several months that I needed to make a job change. I can't really explain it other than I just knew it was time for me to move on and that God's work for me was somewhere else. I found a job at a completely different facility. I applied, interviewed and was offered the job. I struggled greatly with my decision. I didn't really feel like I had a sense of what God wanted me to do. After much prayer, I decided to take the job.

I knew by day two of orientation that I had made a huge mistake. I was not happy in my new job. I continued on, hoping that the newness would wear off, my uneasiness would subside and I would grow to like my new endeavor. That didn't happen. My dislike grew to hatred and I gradually became completely consumed by trying to figure out how to get out of my new job. I was desperate for an immediate change. I was beginning to make myself and my family miserable. I couldn't function outside of my job. I feel like I was trying to do a decent job in my work and my superiors told me that they were very pleased with how I was doing. However, outside of work I completely shut down. All of my relationships began to suffer. I felt so sorry for myself that I could barely function. I put everything on hold, pending on my much-anticipated job change. I was just waiting for my life to return to a more favorable state. I stopped doing God's work. I stopped singing with the worship team at church. I eventually stopped posting in my blog. I no longer read the bible on a regular basis.

I will say that I prayed all the time. I prayed for my family and friends, but I mostly prayed for myself and my job issues. I begged and pleaded with the Lord several times each day.  My vision blurred on the long drives to and from work as I wept bitterly, pouring my heart out to God.

I then discovered a new job. It was completely different from my previous work. I could really see myself in this job and I thought that I would really prosper in this new opportunity. It was a newly-created position that I thought God made just for me. I soared quickly and easily through the interview process. I was told that my interview was excellent and that I presented myself very well. I thought the job was surely mine.

And then I got the email. They offered the job to someone else! I completely lost it. I hit rock bottom. I felt like I was drowning in a pit of despair. I was trapped in this job that I hate and now there was no hope of any way out! I had pinned all of my hope to this job that now belonged to someone else. I was angry and confused. I felt so sad and betrayed. I cried out bitterly to God. Why?!! Why did this happen?!! What did I do to deserve this?!! Why would God want me to be miserable in my work? I thought and said things that I regretted. I yelled at my husband. I hated myself and felt responsible for the state of my life. What was I to do now? I didn't know how I could go on. I couldn't keep going back to that job that I hate. I just couldn't! What was I going to do? I wanted to completely give up on my job and my life. I felt lost.  

After tossing and turning all night I managed to drag myself to church the next morning, still feeling sorry for myself. I could hardly believe it when I heard the sermon. I thought that Pastor Greg was talking directly to me. I realize that the message was for me but that it was God who was doing the talking. Pastor Greg spoke about how the Lord has been working on him for the past month. He said that God was doing surgery on his soul and that he was removing the pride from his life. He said he didn't even know that he had this pride until the Lord showed it to him. He accounted that the process was very difficult and painful and that he fought it at first but that the Lord has helped him to grow spiritually into a completely new man. He said God was moving him to tell us all to give our sins and burdens over to God so he can work within us and heal us.

It was then that I recognized how selfish I was being. I wanted a perfect job and a perfect life and I was throwing a fit about it. I wanted things my way and I was not at all interested in what God wanted me to do. I realized that sometimes being in God's will is not easy and not comfortable. I went to the alter to pray and make myself right before the Lord. I felt humbled, cleansed and renewed.

I'm not going to tell you that I magically have a sudden love for my job because I don't. I can say that I do feel a sense of peace about the situation. I know that this journey that I'm on will probably continue to be difficult and somewhat painful. I've come to terms with the fact that for some reason the Lord wants me to be right where I am right now. He may have some kind of work for me there or maybe he will work within me through this experience to help me grow spiritually and be a better servant for him. Even though it's not easy to move on without knowing where God's plan will lead, I will go forward trusting in him and having faith that he knows what is best for me.

James 5:7-12

⁷ Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains. ⁸ You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. ⁹ Don’t grumble against one another, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door!

¹⁰ Brothers and sisters, as an example of patience in the face of suffering, take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. ¹¹ As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.
¹² Above all, my brothers and sisters, do not swear—not by heaven or by earth or by anything else. All you need to say is a simple “Yes” or “No.” Otherwise you will be condemned.
www.biblegateway.com

Roadblock

Sometimes life is so hard. Making a decision that will affect your life and your family's life in a huge way is certainly difficult. So many hours of praying and waiting with still no clear direction from God is indeed a challenge. When this happens, I recommend that you follow your first instinct. It is usually the one that comes from your heart. If your heart is actively seeking God, this first instinct is usually the right one.

I believe that we can get in a place in our life when we just need a change. We can get burnt out and lose the passion that we once felt for what we've been doing for the last fourteen years. When we get to this point, any change can look good. I also believe that the devil can entice us into making a change that is not right for us at that time. He will make it look great. He can even make it look like it is something that is God's will.

Have you ever made an important decision and then discovered within about 2 days that you made the wrong one? It's such a horrible feeling. You can't go back to what you had before because what's done is done. And when you think about it you know you don't really want to go back because deep down inside it doesn't feel right to you anymore either. You're trapped. You feel caught between a rock and a hard place. You long for something different but aren't sure what that is or where that is. What do you do now? Who do you turn to?

Well, I believe the only answer is to turn to Jesus. He is always the right answer. Even when we have made the most horrible decisions possible, Jesus will always be right there beside us. He knows us even better than we know ourselves. He knows our deepest, most intimate thoughts . . . the things within our hearts that we've never told anyone about because we are too ashamed. Jesus knows all of this about us and he still loves us unconditionally. He loves us so much that he endured tremendous pain and suffering while he died for our sins. Who else do you know that has done this for you? He died for me and he died for you. Why did he do this? He did these things for us so that we could be saved from a horrible fate . . . eternal separation from God (also know as spending the rest of your life in hell.) What an amazing gift that is available to anyone who will accept it! What do you have to do to accept it? Simply acknowledge that you have sinned, ask Jesus to forgive you, recognize that he died for your sins and rose again and then ask him to guide your life. You will be amazed at what will happen. I know that I was.

So that's where I'm at right now. I'm realizing that I made the wrong decision. (Oh how difficult it is to admit that you're wrong, especially when it includes telling your husband that he was right.) But I'm also trusting in God. I'm looking to him as I take this one day at a time. I'm worshipping him in the midst of this turmoil. I'm seeking his face with all of my heart and soul. I know that I need him and can do nothing (NOTHING) without him. I will wait patiently as he finds a place for me. I also realize that God knew that I would make this wrong decision and I will try to accomplish his work while I am there. These are just a few of the words I got from the Lord this morning, "Oh, my child, I love you. I am yours and you are mine. Sometimes you must make the wrong decision to find the right one. I will bring good of this if you let me. Look to me and trust me in this. Continue to worship me with all of your heart, my daughter. I will never leave you: not in this, not ever. You are precious to me and I want what is good and right for you."

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Oh and one more thing. . . if you pray that God will block something if it is not his will and then you literally drive up to a road block on your way to the thing you've been praying about, take it seriously. It may indeed be God's way of telling you that he is "blocking" it.
www.biblegateway.com

The End of a Journey

Lately as I work, I can't help but think about how my time there is almost over. I have only a few short days until this chapter of my life will end and a new chapter will begin. I remember when I first started fourteen and a half years ago as a brand new nurse. I was completely clueless and very naive. I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into. To be completely honest, it was pretty rough at first but I somehow survived and even prospered.

I have accumulated an abundance of knowledge over these years. My experience is truly priceless and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I feel like I've seen or done just about everything possible. I've encountered people at their best and people at their worst. I've been involved in situations that have made me cry from the deepest part of my soul, wondering why the Lord would allow someone to suffer so tremendously. I've enjoyed triumphs greater than I could have ever imagined. I'd like to think that I've touched the lives of some of my patients. Many of them have genuinely touched my life.

My coworkers have become like my family. I have had days that I don't think I could have endured without them. We've shared so many tears and a lot of laughter. We've been each other's listening ears and encouragers. I feel honored and privileged to have worked so closely with such a great group of people. We have worked together as one unit, doing whatever it takes to get the job done right. Anyone who wonders what real teamwork looks like should get a glimpse of the staff of an emergency department or trauma unit. I have really enjoyed working with them all of these years. They are an invaluable wealth of knowledge and experience. I would trust them completely with my own life. I will miss them so much. I am choking back tears just thinking about it as I type this.

It was very difficult for me to make this decision. I didn't really have a clear direction from the Lord in this. I believe that a lot of the uncertainty stemmed from the sacrifices that accompany this choice. I will be driving 19 miles farther and will be taking a significant pay cut initially. Sometimes we must make sacrifices to be in God's will. He has made the ultimate sacrifice for us and he expects us to sacrifice for him as well.

When I went to job shadow, I knew that the job would be a good fit for me and that I would enjoy it. I also had this overwhelming feeling that they need me and that I am meant to be there at this time in my life. I feel like I have made the right decision. I remember someone telling me once that God doesn't want us to be comfortable in our lives. He wants us to step outside of the box and rely completely on him. If we were always comfortable then we would probably feel very self-sufficient and would think we didn't need God at all.

I have to admit that I feel a bit anxious as I look forward to starting my new job. I had a complete meltdown the day I put in my two week notice. I literally sat on the living room floor sobbing as I wondered if I had made a huge mistake. Change, whether good or bad, is always difficult. We are safe in our daily routines, seeing the same people we see every day and doing the things we've done hundreds or thousands of times. It feels very uneasy to embark on a new journey when the future is uncertain. It's hard to take the first step when you can't see the rest of the staircase.

I will move forward in faith and trust in the Lord and his plan for me. I completely put this into his hands. I know that he has great things in store for me and probably a few new life lessons along the way.

2 Corinthians 5:7

⁷ For we live by faith, not by sight.

^{www.biblegateway.com}

The Courage of Esther

I sat in church this morning awaiting the usual Mother's Day sermon, expecting to be crying by the end of the service. Usually Mother's Day brings a sermon that makes me question what kind of a mother I really am. I can still remember how completely incompetent I felt a few years ago when the Mother's Day sermon was about the wife of noble character from Proverbs 31:10- 31. I don't know a single woman who would live up to those standards. I'm not saying these sermons are bad. I will be the first to admit that I think everyone needs to hear a sermon that really makes them feel convicted every now and then. I believe this will make us evaluate who we are as a Christian, a parent, a spouse, etc and then strive to become the best person we can be. However, such was not the case this morning in church. The sermon came from a forgotten book in the Old Testament called Esther. When I first became a Christian, I read the entire Bible from beginning to end in about a year. For some unknown reason I completely did not remember reading the book of Esther. I found myself sitting and listening intently as the sermon unfolded, enthralled by the life of Esther.

Esther was a young Jewish girl when the king began his search for a queen. A quest for beautiful young virgins began in the kingdom. Esther lost her parents as a child and was being raised by her uncle. Esther, who was a young to mid teen, was chosen for her beauty and taken against her will to the palace with several other young women. She spent the next year of her life undergoing extensive beauty treatments before she could even meet the king. During her first meeting with the king, she lost her virginity to him. All of the chosen virgins would lose their virginity to the king. This could have been the only time Esther ever met the king. She did find favor with the king and became his queen. All along, she kept her Jewish heritage a secret. I thought about Esther's life and what dreams she might have had. What did she give up when she was taken from her family?

While Esther was queen, she learned of a plot to kill all Jews in the kingdom. Upon the prompting of a close nobleman, the king issued a decree to support this plan. Esther's uncle asked her to go before the king to try to stop this command. Esther informed her uncle that anyone who went before the king without being summoned would die unless the king held out his golden scepter to have that person's life spared. Her uncle again pleaded that Esther intercede on behalf of her people. She agreed to go before the king with this request. Can you imagine how difficult this decision must have been for Esther? She, a teenager, had the weight of every Jewish person's life on her shoulders. She knew she could have been easily put to death for approaching the king about this matter. When she did decide to go through with it, she instructed her uncle to have all of the Jews fast and pray for her for three days. She and her maids also fasted and prayed for three days.

Esther went before the king and he not only spared her life but the lives of all of the Jewish people. He sent another decree to allow all of the Jewish people to defend themselves against their attackers. (No decree from the king could ever be revoked, therefore the previous decree still stood.) The Jews successfully fought off thousands of enemies. The nobleman responsible for formulating the plot was hung and Esther's uncle took his place as second to the king.

I think this story is an amazing testimony of God's awesome power. He used Esther in her unfortunate circumstances to accomplish His will for His people. He placed her there in the palace in a position of influence. She was one person who followed God's prompting and saved the lives of thousands of God's people. What if she decided to ignore God's request? What would have happened to the Jewish people? Esther's courageous act completely overwhelms me. I think of my own life and the daily decisions I make and I can't even begin to compare them to the magnitude of Esther's difficult decision. I admire her for her selflessness as she put her own life on the line for her people. I wonder if I would have the courage to do the same. Sometimes I can feel God tapping me on the shoulder and telling me to do something that seems completely out of the question to me at the time. Thoughts of failure and ridicule plague my mind as I ponder the unimaginable task the Lord has planned for me. I will try to remember Esther and her inspiring story as I go about my own life. When I feel God telling me to do something, I will try to follow the Lord's plan, with His constant help, of course. I would hate to think about what would happen if I decided to ignore God's prompting and not fulfill His plan for me.

Oh, and one last thing. Did you catch the part about the fasting and prayer? Esther didn't do anything until she and many other people fasted and prayed about it for three days. God wants us to pray about things before we do them. He wants us to consult Him in all of our decisions and the way to do this is through prayer. I completely believe that if Esther and others hadn't prayed about it first, Esther may have failed. Esther was wise beyond her years when she decided to pray first. If we don't ask, we can't receive.

Matthew 7:8
For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
Mark 11:24
Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
John 16:24
Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.
http://www.biblegateway.com/

Beautiful Snowflake

The closer I draw to the Lord, the more I see His amazing work in my life. He is all around me, in every detail of my life. I see Him in the people, situations and single moments in my life. I"m not sure why I didn't notice the magnitude of His work in my life before. I'm certain that He has always been at work around me. Perhaps I have been motivated by my own selfish desires and too wrapped up in my own agenda to notice Him. The more I seek Him, the more I see Him all around me. To be completely honest, He absolutely astonishes me with His goodness and blessings. I see things now that I never noticed before. I would love to share some of these things with you.

A few weeks ago I met a woman that is truly a servant of God. Lets call her Beth. Beth was a complete stranger when the Lord crossed her path with mine for a brief moment. She has been caring for her disabled teenage son for all of his life. Her son is unable to walk. Beth provides all of his care, including lifting him regularly by herself. She also takes care of her 90 year old grandmother. Beth's grandmother has an arm fracture and is also unable to walk. Beth provides all of her grandmother's care, including lifting her regularly by herself. I could see that Beth was overwhelmed with her responsibilities so I discussed with Beth the possibility of placing her grandmother in an extended care facility. Beth said that she would never let that happen. She said that her grandmother raised her because her alcoholic, drug-addicted mother left her and her father when she was an infant. Beth said that she knows that God will help her care for her family. I admire Beth and her selflessness. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it must be for her to care for her family daily. I'm sure she must make regular sacrifices to provide for them in this way. As I reflect on Beth, I know that I probably wouldn't have given her another thought if not for God's prompting. I find that Beth is frequently on my mind and I pray for her and her family often. I feel like I can see God's good in people now. I was once judgemental and critical of others.



http://www.flickr.com/photos/sarahpurpleface/4200116600/lightbox/



This weekend we went to the grocery store. I know that this doesn't sound very profound. As we were walking through the parking lot, we couldn't help but notice the huge, fluffy clumps of snow falling from the sky. We have had very little snow so far this winter so we marveled at the beauty of the snowfall. My son and I stopped to catch some of the falling snow on our coat sleeves. As we looked at the clumps of snow, we noticed that each clump was made up of several intricately-detailed snowflakes stuck together. Each snowflake was beautiful but different from the other. I couldn't help but wonder how anyone could look at a snowflake and not know for sure that there is an Awesome Creator. The amazing detail of each snowflake is certainly not something that can happen by chance. Isn't God cool that He makes these beautiful little masterpieces fall all around us every time that it snows? And then I thought about how small each individual flake is and how many, many flakes clumped together can create a complete transformation of the world around us. I compared it to each one of God's children. He makes us all beautiful in our own way. However, we can still feel small and insignificant in this vast and sometimes brutal world around us. When we join in His name with His other servants to become His body of Christ, we can accomplish things that would be otherwise insurmountable.

Yesterday I cleaned the house. I hate cleaning the house. Besides having dental work or a medical procedure, cleaning the house is my least favorite thing to do. Well, anyway, I cleaned the house because it really needed to be done. I decided to listen to my Ipod to make the experience more pleasant. I knew that my Ipod wasn't completely charged. When I turned it on, I noticed that it had slightly less than half of the battery. I started playing my "worship songs" playlist and went about the business of cleaning, expecting my Ipod to die within about an hour. Roughly an hour later, I barely heard the phone ringing. I stopped the music and answered the phone. When I hung up, I looked at my Ipod again. The battery bar was red now and showed pretty much no battery left. Well, I decided to keep listening to my worship music since it hadn't died yet. Our cat followed me around the house and looked at me like I was a freak as I belted out all of my favorite worship songs. I am not exaggerating when I tell you that I cleaned at least another two and a half hours and my Ipod never died. Such a God thing. :)

As I was dusting the shelves in our living room, I noticed the two small wooden shoes that my grandparents had carved several years ago. I have dusted the same shoes many times before. As I was listening to my worship music and praising God while I cleaned, a new thought popped into my mind. I thought about the tiny wooden shoes and how we obtained them. I remembered that it was back when I was a freshman in high school and I was dating my husband. I took him to our family Christmas at my grandparents' house. My grandmother was a kind and loving woman that would never want anyone to feel uncomfortable or unloved. My husband (boyfriend at the time) was very surprised when he was presented with the small gift to open. My grandmother had given him the small wooden shoe that my grandfather had carved and she had stained. Not more than a month later, Mike and I broke up. I never really thought about the shoe after that. We of course got back together (two years later). Just a few months after Christmas, my grandmother was diagnosed with metastatic cancer. She died that spring. I still miss her so much even now. I had a very close, special relationship with her and my grandfather. When she died, our family fell apart. She was that special ingredient, the glue that held everything together. As I held the shoes I thought about how she is still so much a part of me today. I wouldn't be who I am now without her and the experiences we shared. Then I wondered when I got the other shoe. I thought I could remember getting it as a birthday present when I was a child. My grandparents always gave us hand-carved pieces as gifts. How awesome to now have these two shoes together as a pair, one appropriately smaller and than the other. They remind me of my husband and I being a pair and walking through life together. I am thankful that the Lord brought these things to my mind again. How awesome He is that He brought these two shoes back together. He knew those many years ago that they would be a pair someday. He also knew how special it would be that my grandmother was such a big part of that story.

I attribute my new found spiritual clarity to being closer to God. He is making me more like Him and therefore I can see Him all around me with renewed clarity. The following scripture says it better than I ever could.

1 Corinthians 2:6-16

God’s Wisdom Revealed by the Spirit

 ⁶ We do, however, speak a message of wisdom among the mature, but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing. ⁷ No, we declare God’s wisdom, a mystery that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began. ⁸ None of the rulers of this age understood it, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory. ⁹ However, as it is written:

   “What no eye has seen,
   what no ear has heard,
and what no human mind has conceived”^[a]—
   the things God has prepared for those who love him—

 ¹⁰ these are the things God has revealed to us by his Spirit.

   The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. ¹¹ For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. ¹² What we have received is not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may understand what God has freely given us. ¹³ This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words.^{[b] 14} The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit. ¹⁵ The person with the Spirit makes judgments about all things, but such a person is not subject to merely human judgments, ¹⁶ for,

   “Who has known the mind of the Lord
   so as to instruct him?”^[c]
   But we have the mind of Christ.

As I was working on this post, which I had already entitled "Beautiful Snowflake," I opened my Dove chocolate to the following message:


another God thing!

 http://www.biblegateway.com/

Standing on the Corner

     A few days ago I left work early. We were overstaffed and I didn't have a patient assignment so I asked if I could leave early. As I was driving down the street, I noticed a man standing on the corner holding a sign. He was wearing a bright fluorescent orange vest that a road worker would wear. He was just standing on that corner holding the sign, smiling and waving at people as they drove by. I had seen the same man on the same corner a couple of times before, although I thought it was two or three years earlier. I hadn't really given him much thought before. I just drove on by and carried on with the rest of my day. As I sat at the stoplight on that particular day, I watched the man. For the first time, I really saw the man and thought about what he was doing. The sign he was holding read "Jesus Christ is the name above all names."

     I thought about how difficult it must have been for that man to stand there with that sign for the first time. I'm sure that many people driving by him every day must think he is absolutely crazy standing there with that sign. When the Lord first called the man to minister in this way, he must have thought, "You want me to do what? Really?" It is human nature for us to care about what others think of us. I admired that man and his courage for being obedient to God's calling.
     I then thought about the physical discomfort involved in standing out there on the corner for who knows how many hours. It was pretty cold on the day that I saw him. Did he stand out there in the snow and rain? What about lightening? Had he ever gotten scorched by the sun's rays while he shared the love of God with others? Did he ever almost get hit by a car? How far would this man go? What would he endure to carry out God's purpose for him? And then I wondered, "What would I endure to fulfill God's will?" Would I endure physical discomfort? Pain? Ridicule? Torture? Would I even endure uncertainty about the future, not knowing where God's plan would take me?

     I know it seems crazy to think that I pondered all of these things as I watched the man with the sign for that brief moment. I then realized that God put that man there for me to see. He wanted me to see the man's amazing obedience to him despite the certainty of being judged by others. He also wanted me to see his steadfast endurance and faith in God as he withstood unpleasant and potentially dangerous environmental conditions. I remembered thinking about seeing the man there two or three years earlier. The Lord brought to mind the man's continued faithfulness and obedience as he continued to follow the Lord's calling for him for all of those years. God wanted me to see that man and to evaluate my own life and my own obedience to Him. He wanted me to ask myself, "Do I have what it takes to stand on the corner alongside that man, proclaiming the word of God to everyone passing by?" Do you have what it takes?

Deuteronomy 5:33
Walk in obedience to all that the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live and prosper and prolong your days in the land that you will possess.
Romans 5:19
For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.
http://www.biblegateway.com/

Into the Fog . . .

As we left the house this morning to head to worship service, I couldn't help but notice the beauty of the scene around me. As we traveled to the church, I noticed the the fog as it completely enveloped us in all directions. The sparkling white frost on the tree branches and the thick coating of snow on the ground made a winter wonderland that was worthy of being framed and hung on our wall. I couldn't help but think how awesome the Lord is to create all of this beauty just for us, his children that he loves dearly. How amazing is it that God, the Almighty Creator, loves us this much and also that he wants to meet us on a personal level. He wants to walk with us daily. He wants to be involved in every detail of our lives. On one hand, his power and might are beyond what we are even capable of imagining. On the other hand, he relates to us intimately and knows us better than we even know ourselves. The bible says that he even knows how many hairs are on our heads.

Luke 12:6-8:

⁶ Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. ⁷ Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
   ⁸ “I tell you, whoever publicly acknowledges me before others, the Son of Man will also acknowledge before the angels of God.

As I took a closer look at the fog around me, I thought about the dangers involved in traveling into a thick white haze. We couldn't see what was in front of us. What if there was a car coming toward us that was driving in our lane? What if a deer was standing in the middle of the road up ahead? What if there was a large pothole that we couldn't see? There could even be a freshly fallen tree laying across the road. I realized that driving into the fog took a certain degree of faith. I compare it to trusting in the Lord when you follow his will for your life instead of following your own will. This certainly takes a lot of faith. When God tells you to do something, you may not know what is ahead. He often doesn't reveal his entire plan when you take that first step. It can be very uncomfortable and even scary to step into the fog when you can't see what's to come. However, you will be rewarded by having faith and trusting in him. Will you have the faith to follow the Lord into the fog?

http://www.biblegateway.com/

A Miracle Witnessed

I would like to share with you the story of a true miracle. Everything you are about to read is the absolute truth.

I was a 21 year old college student when I noticed a large mass protruding from the right side of my abdomen. You could see the mass with your eyes and feel the mass with your hands. I knew this was obviously not normal so I went to see my doctor. He was perplexed and sent me to a local surgeon. The surgeon was also perplexed. He ordered an ultrasound of my gallbladder. While I was having the ultrasound, the technician said she needed to go get the radiologist. I sensed that this was a bad sign. The radiologist returned to tell me that there appeared to be a large mass in my liver. A CT scan was scheduled for a few days after this. After I had the CT scan, my mother and I were informed that I had multiple inoperable tumors throughout my abdomen. The report indicated that I had tumors in my liver and pancreas as well as a large tumor wrapped around my aorta. I was in shock. INOPERABLE! Translation: you are going to die from these tumors! A biopsy guided by CT scan was scheduled for 2 weeks later. I informed my family and friends of the bad news. Everyone, including me, was in total shock. I was young and healthy. How could I be dying?

I had a good friend at the time who was a minister's daughter and a Christian. Her name is Amy. Amy told me that she and her family as well as her entire church congregation would be praying for me and my health issues. I was grateful and thanked her but I didn't really expect much to result from the prayers. I was not a Christian at the time. To say the least, I was completely clueless about the things of God.

 I went to have the biopsy 2 weeks later. The radiologist was dumbfounded. "Why?" you ask. Because this CT scan only showed one tumor, in my liver. There were no other tumors in my pancreas, around my aorta or in any other part of my abdomen. I asked the radiologist if perhaps the first CT scan showed all of the "tumors" because the contrast that I drank didn't distribute properly to all areas of my abdomen and just made it look like I had tumors. He said that this was not possible and that several physicians from the area had met to look at my previous CT scan. He said that they all had agreed that I had multiple inoperable tumors. The radiologist said that he couldn't explain why the other tumors were gone and that I should consider it a miracle. I proceeded to have the tumor in my liver biopsied. It was benign. I did end up having a liver resection (a large portion of my liver removed) and my gallbladder removed.

Now that I am a Christian, I look back on all that has happened in my life and the ways that God has worked in my life that I didn't recognize then. Certainly, the fact that he saved me from inoperable cancer is nothing other than a miracle. I am so thankful to the Lord for everything in my life, including my health and well-being. I am completely healthy and cancer-free to this day. I'm not saying that having a major surgery was easy, but I can see how God used that time in my life to draw me closer to him. Everything that happens in my life is part of his master plan for me. I feel so blessed that he performed a true miracle in me and that I can use that miracle to touch the lives of others.

I prayed about what words the Lord wanted me to share today. These are the words that he gave me:

     I perform miracles everyday. Some miracles are small and barely noticed, like each breath of air you breathe or the beauty of the sun's rays providing energy and life to plants and trees. Other miracles are huge and unexplainable, like the healing of someone with a terminal illness or the survival of a person involved in a horrific accident.

     There is nothing I cannot do. I created the heavens and the earth. I created every living thing. I formed you when you were in the womb. My power and might is beyond what you are even capable of imagining. I can move mountains if I want to. I heal the smallest cut without you even thinking of how it heals - it is a miracle. All things I have created are miracles in themselves. Think of the conception, development and birth of a child. Is that not a miracle? What about the sacrifice of my son, Jesus so that you can live free of sin and guilt and spend an eternity in my presence? Is this not the greatest miracle of all? My children are so wrapped up in their busy lives that they can't even see all of the miracles around them. Take the time to look around you and see all of the wondrous miracles I've placed in your life. Look at the sun, the stars, the moon and the clouds. Observe the majestic view from a mountain top. Watch the sun sink into the horizon as it sets over the ocean. Examine a single flower or butterfly in all of it's beauty. Look at your own body and all of it's miracles - the very beating of your own heart that circulates oxygen-rich blood to all of your tissues.

     Do not take all of these miracles for granted. Notice them and breathe them in. I did not create the earth and all of it's miracles for me, I created them for you. That's how much I love you. When you notice one of the many miracles around you, take the time to acknowledge me in it and spend some time with me.

Psalm 77:10-15
¹⁰ Then I thought, “To this I will appeal:
   the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand.
¹¹ I will remember the deeds of the LORD;
   yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
¹² I will consider all your works
   and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”
 ¹³ Your ways, God, are holy.
   What god is as great as our God?
¹⁴ You are the God who performs miracles;
   you display your power among the peoples.
¹⁵ With your mighty arm you redeemed your people,
   the descendants of Jacob and Joseph.

Being healed from cancer isn't the only miracle I have experienced. The Lord has healed me physically as well as spiritually. My Heavenly Father has healed my body and my soul. If you want to read about how the Lord saved me from certain death and an eternity without him, please read Salvation in my November 2011 blog archive. If you want to read more about how to have your soul saved from certain death, please read A Fresh Perspective in my December 2011 blog archive. 

Have you witnessed a miracle, big or small? If you have, I would love to hear about it. Have a great day.
http://www.biblegateway.com/